“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” — Theodore Roosevelt

A Story of Trusting the Gut

Recently, I was at a friends house — the kind of friend who feel more like family. We were catching up and her husband joined the conversation-they had just celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary. As we sat together, they started laughing about when they first met.

He liked her. She liked him. But neither of them was sure, so for six months… nothing happened. No one made a move. They just circled around the possibility, both waiting, both wondering.

Finally, he decided he couldn’t risk letting her slip away. He told us, “I didn’t want to regret not getting to know her, or worse, watching her move on to someone else. So I finally did it.”

At that point, his wife jumped in, laughing: “I wasn’t going to ask him out… because I’m a little traditional that way. So if he hadn’t asked, we probably would have been at a stalemate until the day we died!”

That choice — that leap of faith — turned out to be one of the best decisions of his life.

As we talked, the conversation turned to overthinking. How often do we get stuck in the endless courtroom of our own minds, paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong move? He smiled and said, “I just didn’t want to get hurt again, but I had to decide the risk of getting hurt again was worth getting to know her. So I trusted my gut.”

And here they are, 25 years later — living proof that sometimes the risk of stepping forward is the very thing that leads to joy, love, and a life you wouldn’t trade for anything.

Why We Overthink

• Fear of mistakes: We want certainty, so we stall until we feel “safe.”

• Perfectionism: Believing there’s one “right” choice keeps us trapped.

• Past experiences: Old regrets, past betrayals or hurts, often make us hesitant.

• Too much information: Endless research creates analysis paralysis.

The Argument in Your Head

Think of overthinking as a tug‑of‑war between two sides:

• Emotional mind: Driven by fear, doubt, or excitement.

• Rational mind: Focused on logic, pros and cons.

• The goal isn’t to silence either side, but to find the Wise Mind — the balanced voice that integrates both.

Practical Strategies to Break Free

• Name the voices: Label them “Fear” and “Logic” to gain perspective.

• Set a decision deadline: Give yourself a time limit to choose.

• Shrink the decision: Ask, “What’s the worst that could happen?” Often it’s smaller than you think.

• Practice mindfulness: Breathing or grounding exercises quiet the mental courtroom.

• Trust small steps: Decisions don’t have to be final; you can adjust as you go.

 Beyond the Mind: Listening for Inner Guidance

Overthinking isn’t just a mental trap — it can be a spiritual invitation. Many traditions teach that clarity comes not from endless debate, but from stillness and trust.

• Trust vs. Control: Overthinking is often about clinging to control. Shifting toward trust — whether in God, the universe, or divine timing — helps release the need for certainty.

• Inner Stillness: Prayer, meditation, or quiet reflection can silence the courtroom voices and open space for intuition or the “still small voice” within. As Eckhart Tolle reminds us, “Stillness is where creativity and solutions to problems are found.”

• Discernment: Instead of chasing the “perfect” choice, say to yourself: “Even though this decision makes me afraid, I’m going to trust there is a reason I am feeling pulled in this direction.”

• Wise Mind as Soul Wisdom: Emotional mind reflects our vulnerability, Rational mind our intellect, but Wise Mind can be seen as the soul’s balanced wisdom — the voice that integrates both and points us toward wholeness.

• Redefining Failure: Spiritually, even “bad” decisions aren’t failures — they’re opportunities to learn. As my friends’ story shows, even if getting to know each other hadn’t worked out, the act of taking the risk would still have taught them something valuable. If we don’t take risks, we never grow.

• Simple Rituals: Light a candle, journal as prayer, or pause with an affirmation before deciding. These small acts anchor decisions in meaning, not just logic.

 The Lesson

Overthinking can keep us paralyzed, trapped in the courtroom of our own minds. But decisions aren’t just about logic or fear — they’re about courage, trust, and sometimes faith. The story of my friends reminds us that the risk of hurt is often outweighed by the possibility of love, growth, and fulfillment.

When you feel stuck in the argument in your head, pause. Listen for your Wise Mind, lean into trust, and remember: the best decisions are rarely the ones we overthink — they’re the ones we dare to make. And even if the outcome isn’t what you hoped, the act of choosing boldly is never wasted. It’s how we grow.

 Reflection Questions

• What decision are you currently overthinking?

• Which “voices” show up most often in your head — fear, logic, or both?

• How might trusting your gut or inner guidance change the way you approach this choice?

• If the decision didn’t go as planned, what growth or learning could still come from it?

 Call to Action

The next time you catch yourself stuck in the courtroom of your mind, don’t wait forever — take one small step forward. Trust that even if fear is present, there’s a reason you feel pulled in that direction. Risk is the doorway to growth, and growth is the path to peace.