Ok...So I'm a Hypocrite Sometimes

In today’s world, hustle culture has become a badge of honor — a relentless push to be productive, successful, and constantly “on.” Social media amplifies it with slogans like “rise and grind” and “sleep is for the weak,” glorifying overwork and making rest feel like failure. But beneath this shiny exterior lies a darker truth: hustle culture is linked to increased anxiety, depression, and burnout. Studies show that chronic overwork can actually reduce productivity, creativity, and emotional resilience.

Last night, I nearly fell asleep standing up at the dojo. If someone had handed me a pillow between drills, I would’ve curled up on the mat without hesitation. I was huffing and puffing — which was embarrassing, because I’m usually pretty active — struggling to get through Karate, not from lack of motivation, but from sheer exhaustion after working 12-hour days to finish some big projects. I love my work — it’s deeply fulfilling — but lately, I’ve been running on fumes.

As a therapist, I talk about self-care all the time. I encourage my clients to rest, to listen to their bodies, to honor their limits. And yet, here I am, a little bit of a hypocrite. (Bad therapist!) I forget that rest isn’t a luxury — it’s a necessity. My body knows when it’s time to slow down. It whispers, then it shouts. And last night, it was practically screaming. I fell asleep when I got home — still wearing my Gi — curled up on the couch like a worn-out warrior.

I’ve been working since I was 16. The drive to be “productive” is deeply ingrained in me — it’s how I was raised, how I’ve built my life, and how I’ve measured my worth for years. But I’ve learned that part of loving yourself is giving yourself permission to rest. To reflect. To have fun. To be a whole person, not just a busy one.

We’ve glamorized self-care into something sparkly and Instagrammable. Pedicures, face masks, fancy lattes. And while those things can be lovely — I’m not knocking a good foot soak — they’re not the core of what self-care really is.

Real self-care is about recognizing your body’s signals before burnout takes hold. It’s noticing when your sleep is off, when your mood dips, when your energy crashes, when your patience thins. These are not flaws — they’re invitations to pause.

For me, self-care looks like:

• Sitting in silence with an animal curled up beside me

• Writing — it’s my exhale, my way of releasing and reconnecting

• Painting with oil paints and not worrying about how it looks

• Hiking in the fall — my favorite season to be in nature

• Reading a good psychological thriller

• Hanging out with friends and family

• Trying a new restaurant

• Facetiming with my adult children

• Watching a good movie

• Calling my bestie just to laugh and catch up

• Meditation and quiet contemplation

• Vision boarding on Pinterest — dreaming about travel to Italy, Greece, Bali, and going on a safari

Self-care isn’t about escaping life. It’s about returning to yourself. It’s about remembering that you are worthy of rest, of gentleness, of care — even when the to-do list is long and the deadlines are looming.

 Your Turn: Build Your Self-Care Toolkit

What does self-care look like for you? What fills your cup, calms your mind, and reconnects you to joy? And maybe most importantly — why aren’t you doing it?

Take a moment to reflect. Write it down. Start small. Build your own self-care toolkit with practices that feel authentic, nourishing, and sustainable. You deserve it.

And hey — don’t be a hypocrite like your therapist. (Seriously, I’m writing this while ignoring my own Pinterest board labeled “REST, PLEASE.”)